#kevins got his priorities

[monstrousgourmandizingcats]

Q&A: Let's Have a Conclave!

Q: What happened to Pope Francis?

A: He got old and died.

Q: Why is your tag "#deadfrank 2k25"?

A: Because he died, he was called Francis (although his real first name was Jorge), and it's 2025.

Q: What's happening now?

A: The Catholic Church is preparing for a new Pope, who will be elected in a conclave, like from the noted book and movie Conclave. This conclave will be sometime between May 5 and May 10; what's going on until then is a series of funerary rituals and "general congregations," i.e. meetings of the cardinals to discuss their overall thoughts on what they might like to see for the Church when they start voting. The conclave is strictly secret but the general congregations aren't; however, the cardinals tend in practice to be cagey about both stages in the process. Cardinals who vote in the conclave itself have an age limit of eighty, but the general congregations are open to older cardinals as well.

Q: What are the important numbers to remember with the conclave?

A: The total number of cardinals voting is going to be somewhere in the low 130s; 135 are eligible, two said they couldn't make it for health reasons, and now it looks like one of those two might be able to make it after all, putting the current figure at 133 or 134. To get elected Pope you need two-thirds of that, which currently is either 89 or 90.

Q: Who's in charge in the meantime?

A: Kevin Farrell, the Camerlengo (chamberlain) of the Holy Roman Church, a frankly somewhat dislikeable old snake with an MBA who used to be Bishop of Dallas (yes, the one in Texas) before getting appointed to a central position in Rome.

Q: What is the next Pope going to be like?

A: Firm answer: Nobody knows.

My educated guess: It's going to be someone who continues a lot of Francis's priorities, but maybe not one of the big names and maybe not the priorities people in the First World tend to associate with him. The Western conservatives are alienating the sort of Global South wild cards they'd have to win over, and we're getting statements stressing continuity and finishing the work Francis started from people like Rwanda's Antoine Kambanda and Myanmar's Charles Maung Bo. These are people who are going to want to see more of Francis's informality, his populism, and probably his focus on climate action and poverty relief. What that would mean for women's or LGBT people's status in the Church could be almost anything, since plenty of people in the developing world with the above views are very socially conservative otherwise, but the full-on reactionaries seem pretty locked out.

Q: Who are some of the papabili ("pope-able") cardinals?

A: Tolentino de Mendonça, Tagle, Zuppi, Parolin, Grech, Prevost, López Romero, Aveline, Pizzaballa, Turkson, Arborelius, Ambongo, Ranjith, and Erdő are some of the names to look into here, listed vaguely from "left" to "right" (although these are tricky terms in this context and at least one voting cardinal, Malaysia's Sebastian Francis, avowedly thinks using them is a form of Eurocentrism). But it doesn't have to be one of them; in fact, it doesn't even have to be one of the cardinals voting; it just always is.

Q: Is he seriously named that?

A: Yes, the Latin Patriarch of Jerusalem, the bishop responsible for (among other things) most Palestinian Christians, is really named Pierbattista Pizzaballa. I'm told it sounds silly even to native speakers of Italian.

Q: Is my fave [Tagle/Zuppi/Erdő if I have anyone like that following me/Pizzaballa/whoever] going to be Pope?

A: There's no one odds-on favorite, so probably not.

Q: Is my least fave going to be Pope?

A: See above.

Q: Who are you, monstrousgourmandizingcats, rooting for?

A: Zuppi, but it's not up to me.

Q: Is Kevin from Dallas a papabile?

A: Lmao no.

Q: Why are all these people men?

A: There ain't no rule that says a cardinal has to be a man, since a cardinal is technically a separate thing from a priest, but it would be very very difficult for all sorts of logistical and cultural reasons for a pope to actually appoint a woman as a cardinal, and not even Pope Francis ever seriously considered it. There is one woman, a nun called Simona Brambilla, who accidentally got an email inviting her to the general congregations because she's the head of a dicastery (a department of the Church's central government), but unfortunately she doesn't seem to have taken the mailing list up on it.

Q: Is the process fun to follow?

A: Very fun, yes, but also stressful for those of us who care a lot about the Church's direction.

Q: What's the talk among the cardinals focusing on so far?

A: According to Italian-language news, which is usually the most informed on this stuff, the big topics are migrant/refugee issues and how powerful the Church's central administration should be, not necessarily in that order.

Q: Any drama so far?

A: Yes! Angelo Becciu, a corrupt cardinal who resigned his right to sit in a conclave after a criminal conviction for fraud, had resignee's remorse, showed up for one of the general congregations, and had to be escorted out by the Swiss Guards. Kevin from Dallas got taken off Mass duty for (iirc) the sixth of the "Novemdiales" (nine days) of formal mourning for Pope Francis and they replaced him with Víctor Manuel Fernández, an Argentinian cardinal whom the right flank of the Church despises because he's the architect of kinda-sorta-if-you-squint allowing blessings of same-sex couples. Some conservative old guard cardinals supposedly descended on their safe deposit boxes for blinged-out gold pectoral crosses that Francis wouldn't let them wear while he was alive. I'm sure there's much much more to come!

[nathaslosthershit]

Interviews and Playdates (OP81)

(Part of the Teen Dad!Oscar Piastri Au) Summary: The twins have made their paddock debut! The media is asking many of the drivers about it and the kids make a friend… or two.

The twins had been unable to sit still since they woke up this morning, too excited to get to visit the paddock for the first time and finally get to see their dad race. Oscar had hoped they would finally believe that he did in fact race the cars, something the twins were still not convinced of. 

Being that it was Oscar’s home race, he had decided to fly his family out to see his home. It was an exciting moment for the whole family. 

The minute they got to the paddock, all eyes were on them. Oscar and his fiancée had warned the kids of the media and fans, that there would be screaming and a lot of people. Luckily, the noise and amount of people just made the twins shy, huddling by their parents’ legs, which the adults definitely preferred, losing the two on the paddock at their first race wouldn’t have been the best of first impressions. 

As usual, the twins had their priorities in order. Before getting to the McLaren garage, they had demanded to their father that they be able to see their honorary uncle, Logan Sargeant, who wouldn’t be racing that day.

When the twins got to the Williams garage, their favorite American was waiting to greet them, with two LS2 Williams childrens hats, as well as a bag of blue colored candy for them to share. Despite how Logan had been feeling before they had come to visit, seeing them made him feel infinitely much better. 

“Logan please, they are off naps and if we give them sugar they are going to crash. I’m not even sure they are going to stay awake long enough to make it until race time.” Oscar pleaded as he watched his longtime friend ignore him and give his kids the treats anyway.

“Oscar its fine, let him spoil them a little.” Honey, Oscar’s fiancée, said.

“Do you guys like the new hats? See the LS? That's my logo. I thought when you guys are surrounded by all the orange- sorry papaya, you’d like to be able to easily see these two with their blue hats.” Logan said, first talking to the twins then their parents. Even if half of him just wanted to have them wearing Williams and Logan merch to piss Lando off, he also thought having them sticking out would be a good idea. It was sweet how much he cared.

After the Williams visit, on the way to the McLaren garage, the Piastri family was met with the two Haas drivers with two girls hiding behind them.

“Oscar, we have two girls here who wanted to say hi to the new grid kids.” Kevin Magnessun said as he pushed his daughter in front of him.

Oscar could see the Haas media admin recording this encounter, ready to capture the cute moment on tape.

But as kids do, there wasn’t much talking between the kids as their dads talked at first, finally after a bit of convincing and nudging, once the ice was broken, they had gotten along quite well. To the point that they all had to take their kids away, kicking and screaming once they had to leave. Luckily though, they had calmed down by the time they got to the McLaren garage. 

Tired from the sugar and fighting their parents when separating from the Haas girls, the twins weren’t too enthusiastic when greeted by McLaren members, which their parents apologized tenfold for. They did luckily perk up when they saw their second favorite  honorary uncle coming towards them. 

“What the hell are these two wearing, Oscar?” Lando asked, pointing to the LS hats the kids proudly adorned. 

“We stopped by the Williams garage just cause it was on the way and got two hats from Logan, I'm sure if you had beat him to it they would be wearing your merch but I think they are too attached to them now.” It was a lie, but Oscar didn’t feel the need to tell Lando his kids pleaded to go see Logan before him. He also didn’t mention that his son said he liked the hat so much because McLaren’s orange “hurt his eyes”. 

The kids were luckily well behaved for the race, having slept through a bit of it. They were also fortunate that, due to unfortunate circumstances, Logan joined them to watch a little bit of the Grand Prix. 

The best moment however, had to be when Oscar’s daughter saw him getting out of the car and finally muttered the words, “Daddy really drives the car!” to her mother. 

With all the excitement on the paddock about the Piastri twins, it seemed the media pen was more interested in what some of the drivers had to say about it, rather than asking questions about the race.

Logan Sargeant

“So Logan, rough day for you having to give up your car, but it seems your ‘niece and nephew’ have made their paddock debut, even rocking your own merch in the McLaren garage! How was that for you?” The interviewer asked.

“Yeah, them being here and keeping me company made it all a lot better. They immediately came to Williams because according to Oscar they were demanding to see me. And they wore the LS hats the entire time even though I wasn't racing so I think that has cemented me as the favorite once again.”

Lando Norris

“So it seems you and Logan Sargeant have a bit of an off track feud going on relating to the Norris twins and who their favorite uncle is. Logan had mentioned earlier that they had begged to go to Williams to visit him, before they even got to the McLaren garage. Did you know about this?”

The smile was immediately whipped from Lando’s face at this, “I had known, yes, when they came to the garage wearing Williams hats with a bag of treats in their hand I had assumed, but Oscar told me they just stopped over on the way there. I didn’t know they had asked specifically.”

“Seems he keeps lying to you about where the twins' loyalty lies.”

“He does! Makes me look like an idiot every time he does it.” Lando scoffed, “Whatever, I will win them over somehow. Logan just has a few years head start but I’ll find a way.”

Nico Hulkenburg

“Nico, a video posted by the Haas team earlier showed you and Kevin’s girls hanging out with the Piastri twins. Is there a budding friendship there between them?”

“Yes! They met for the first time today because Kevin and I had managed to bring our girls as well. So sweet seeing them altogether. I’m glad that Noemi will have more friends here. She was already telling her mom earlier that she wanted to plan a playdate with them. Might be hard given we live in different countries but I guess we will have to find a way.”

Daniel Ricciardo

“It's been a few months since it was revealed that your fellow aussie driver is a dad, now his kids are joining us on the paddock. What were your reactions at the time?” The interviewer asks.

“Well, I hadn’t known before he addressed it that he had kids, but it doesn’t seem like anyone else did so that isn’t too much of a surprise. Definitely a shock cause he is so young but good for him. I hadn’t seen his kids but I had heard they were over playing with the Haas girls which is adorable. He must be proud to show his kids what he does.” Daniel replied.

Alex Albon

“So, it seems one of your fellow 2019 rookie seems to have beef with your teammate over who is the better uncle to the Piastri twins. Being friends with both of them, do you have any input?”

“I knew before the rumors about the whole situation because Logan accidentally told most of our team when we were all kind of teasing him about how young he is and how he might be inexperienced in childcare, to which he then showed all of us the numerous pictures and videos of the twins that he took while babysitting or visiting, which I don’t think Oscar actually knew about him telling us. But it is sweet, he takes his uncle duties very seriously. Lando on the other hand, I think Oscar has done him an injustice by not telling him he isn’t the favorite because I think if he knew he had competition he would have been working much harder. Not that he isn’t also sweet with them but I think he may have offered to watch them a few more times.”

[mariasont]

Office Sleepover 2 - A.H

a/n: had sm fun writing this one yall

im so down bad for him ugh

masterlist

‧₊˚ ✩°｡⋆♡ ⋆˙⟡♡ ⋆˙⟡♡⋆｡°✩˚₊‧

part one here! part three here!

pairings: aaron hotchner x fem!reader

summary: in which reader gets put on a hit-list and has to stay in the office (kind of based off when penelope got put on a hit-list by the dirty dozen)

warnings: 18+ MDNI, reader flashes hotch AGAIN, drinking on government property lmao, drunk reader, suggestive comments

wc: 3.2k

You were restless, to put it simply. Every conceivable activity within the BAU had been exhausted, and you had explored every nock and cranny of the office, leaving no corner untouched. At this point they should start paying you for tour guides because you'd be an expert.

You were bored, frankly, and lonely--the team had been on a case all week and you were stuck here. How Garcia managed was beyond you--the walls seemed to close in on you as stir craziness took hold. You kept busy with work, offering as much help as possible while staying put, but it really wasn't the same.

You missed the team, and a particular member's absence you felt just a tad more, though you wouldn't admit it. Thankfully, they were supposed to be back any second now. While Penelope had a special place in your heart, the thought of sitting through another round of her and Kevin's awkward flirting was almost too much to bear. Without Hotch to keep it in check, it was all the more excruciating.

"Bye, Kevin," you chimed in unison, your voices intertwining just as the door clicked shut behind him.

Once you were sure he wasn't coming back, you shot Pen a knowing glance, arching an eyebrow as you pointed one of her fuzzy pens at her.

"Ease up on the death stare, will ya?" Penelope chided, as she wheeled her chair back to her computers, her finger twirling towards you. "You get so broody when the boss man's gone."

You lobbed the pen in Penelope's direction. "No," you replied with a huff. "I get broody when the whole team leaves me behind."

"Gasp," Penelope declared, placing a hand over her heart. "Can you believe it? They're genuinely concerned for your well-being. The audacity!"

"Okay, but seriously, what's the bigger priority here--my life or my sanity? Because it's a fine line," you said with a shrug, pushing your chair back dramatically.

But, before the chair could gain any momentum, you found yourself abruptly against the wall, your head cushioned by an unexpected softness. Without a moment to comprehend, your chair was spun, your eyes growing impossibly wide as Hotch's belt appeared abruptly in your line of sight. You raised your eyes to meet his.

"Your life, I would wager," he said evenly, "but then again, I might be a little biased."

You sprang to your feet, too quickly, your foot catching, sending you lurching forward. Almost instantly, Hotch's hand was securing around your arm, preventing you from landing straight on your face.

"Oh, Hotch, sir, hi," you said, flustered and slightly disoriented. "I didn't realize you guys were back."

"We just got back," he said, his hand falling away from your arm, and you hated yourself for how you felt a subtle coolness that replaced the comforting heat of his touch. "Do you have those reports I asked for?"

"Oh, absolutely, they're ready at my desk," you assure. "I'll bring them to your office in a sec."

As he nods and exits, your scoop up your belongings from Penelope's desk, raising a finger. "Don't even say it, Pen."

You ignored the way she cackled as you left, moving to your desk to grab the needed papers. You attention was captured by Spencer and Emily standing by her desk. Without a second thought, you wrapped your arms around them both, pressing them against you.

"Ugh, I missed you guys so much."

They both laugh, their hands taking you in quickly as you lean against them.

Emily grins, ruffling your hair as she nudges you. "A week away and you're this clingy? We'll have the start weaning you off us, huh?"

"Don't tease," Spencer starts, his hand resting on your shoulder, "But out of curiosity, how many times did you check our desks while we were gone?"

"Too many times to count," you admit begrudgingly, a sheepish grin on your face. As you glance up, your eyes catch Hotch's through the glass pane. "Oops, almost forgot why I came down here."

Approaching Hotch's office, you tap on the door frame and enter. "Here ya go, sir." you offer, extending the documents toward him.

Your fingers lightly touch as he takes the papers, and for a moment, you're rooted to the spot, the brief contact sparking a surge of disarray in your senses. God, it's almost beyond belief that one man could have this kind of effect on you.

Hotch nods his acknowledgement. "Thanks," he murmurs. As you pivot to leave, he adds, "Could you sit down for a moment?"

You cast a teasing look over your shoulder. "I hope I'm not in trouble," you say. His expression doesn't change. "Wait, am I? Because that would definitely be enough to push me over the edge, sir."

"No, you're not in trouble," Hotch assures you. "I've received updates concerning your case."

You lowered yourself into the chair, hands perched in your lap, your eyes wide as you met his gaze. "Please tell me it's good news because I'm starting to forget what my own bed feels like."

"You've been here just over a week," Hotch states, matter-of-fact.

You blow out a breath, arms crossed over your chest. "Hotch, it's scary at night."

He clears his throat, "Anyway, it's good news. We've got a lead on the hitman, though it's not the all-clear you're wanting."

"Well, that's something at least," you concede with a nod. "But I don't get why I can't be involved in this investigation."

As Hotch opens his mouth, you jump in, deepening your voice to copy his. "Because you're too close to it."

He regards you steadily, clearly not amused.

"Yup, okay, I'm done, sorry, I'm leaving now," you relent, getting to your feet quickly and striding towards the door, but a hand beats you to it, closing it abruptly and effectively barricading you in.

With a quick turn, you ended up flush against the door, Hotch's hand resting against the wood just above your ear. You felt like you were short-circuiting, your eyes growing wide as they met his. He says your name, but it doesn't quite register--too engrossed in the heady scent of his cologne, the pressing warmth of his body, the nearness of his chest, so close that an inch's movement could mean a soft kiss to his neck. Not like that would be totally inappropriate or anything.

"What?"

"I said, I'm worried about you."

You wanted to kiss him, man, you really wanted to kiss him. You bit the inside of your cheek to refrain from doing so.

"Why?"

It was barely audible, more air than sound, not daring to disturb the space too much, afraid of him suddenly becoming aware of just how close he was.

"You're very quick to make light of things, to make jokes, but I'm asking you to be real with me here. What are you feeling?"

His hand left the door, settling on your shoulder, his thumb hovering just shy of the hollow of your neck. Unconsciously, you found yourself leaning into the gentle pressure.

"That sounded sarcastic, Hotch," you noted, your tongue briefly sweeping across your lips, which seemed to dry out as you talked. "You're not implying my jokes need work, are you?"

His lack of response and narrowing eyes made you cave.

"Okay, fine, Hotch. You want the truth? I'm scared, okay? Is that what you wanted to hear? That I have nightmares every night? That I can't sleep?"

Your breaths came faster, teeth meshing tightly as you stared up at your boss. His hand found your cheek, his thumb sketching a path across your skin that ignited a trail of goosebumps over your whole body, making you hyper-aware of your every pore.

"What can I do to help?"

Stay with you, kiss you, fuck you--numerous thoughts ran raced through your thoughts, but none of them seemed wholly appropriate.

"N-Nothing, Hotch, really, I'm okay. It's not something that can be fixed, which is why I didn't say anything. Plus, everyone on this team has been through worse. I can handle it. I'm tougher than I look."

"I know you are, but I—," his words were cut short, a sudden knock at the door silencing him mid-sentence.

His hands fell away from you, but the sensation lingered, the heat of his touch seeming to brand you, marking where he had been. You ran a hand through your hair in an attempt regain some form of composure, just as he opened the door to reveal JJ.

Her eyes darted between the two of you, finally focusing on Hotch. "Sorry, guys, I have that footage from the press conference--is that what you needed?"

"Yes, right." Hotch nodded, pulling the door open further for her, then returning his attention to you, observing your flushed cheeks and uneven breath. "We'll continue this later, okay?"

"Yeah," you exhaled sharply before ducking out of the room.

You need to get a grip, or maybe a Xanax, probably both.

Once the office had emptied, leaving you alone, you sat pitifully on your bed. It was Friday, but there was not much cause for celebration when you were stuck here, surrounded by stale office air. You sprawled out on the mattress, tracing the patterns of the popcorn ceiling overhead. If someone didn't figure out this hitman situation, you were going to take him out yourself.

Not really, that would definitely be a death wish. Your thoughts were interrupted by the sound of muffled shuffling outside your door. Sitting up, you slid into your slippers and stepped out into the hallway.

"There she is!"

You snickered as Penelope extended her arms with jazz hands, while JJ and Emily lifted their arms to show off their wine stash. Gratefully grabbing a glass from Emily, you pulled them all into a group hug. "I can't help but feel like we're about to be the subject of a very specific memo from HR after this."

Giggles from JJ accompanied the wine pouring as you stepped back. "Hotch is surprisingly on board we this—encouraged it even. Can you believe it?"

Warmth dusted over your cheeks at the thought. You wanted to kiss him even more, if that was even possible.

"Trust me," Penelope insisted, shaking her head as she paused for a drink. "I wouldn't dare cross HR again. Once was more than enough."

You wanted to say you were a classy gal, confident in your ability to drink responsibly--it was only wine, after all, not Everclear. But as the night went on, your voice rose a decibel too high, your balance a bit unreliable, and your displays of affection way too unrestrained.

You were already a touchy person, ask any of your team members, but with a few drinks, you're giving high school sweethearts a run for their money in the PDA department.

Your arms were flung around JJ's neck, peppering her cheek with kisses as you sang along to whatever music Pen was playing in between smooches. JJ was laughing, tilting backward on her heels, nearly knocking you both over.

"I love you guys. So so much." you said, each word stretched and muddled as you reached out to Penelope, who happily linked her fingers with yours.

"You are so drunk!" Emily accused, her palms squishing your face as she chuckled.

"'M not," you protested, words stifled by compressed cheeks.

She freed your face to grab more wine, Penelope not far behind, as you situated yourself on your desk chair.

"You know who I also love?" you questioned to no one in particular as you slid your phone out of your back pocket. "Morgan, Reid, Dave, and--,"

You paused, your nose crinkling as you bit down hard on your tongue.

"And?" Penelope pressed, brows raised as she looked at you expectedly.

"Hmm?" You hummed innocently, blowing a kiss her way as you shrugged off her question. "I'm gonna call Morgan."

Your eyes darted down to your phone, only to find the room swirling like a carousel. It took a heartbeat to register--someone's voice was already coming from the speaker.

"Hello? Morgan? How'd you know I was going to call you?"

"It's Hotch."

Your eyes grew comically large, a hand flying over your mouth, smothering the laughter that threatened to fall. "Hotch! It is so late! Why are you calling me?"

You shushed the group with a finger to your lips, the girls' curious eyes on you as JJ practically crawled towards you to eavesdrop.

"You called me." He paused. "Are you okay?"

"Hotch," his name was more of a whine than anything as you tossed your head back. "I'm fine, like, the definition of A-Okay. I'm with my friends and we're all kinds of okay."

You shot Emily a thumbs up.

"Good. Okay." Another pause. "Maybe drink some water, yeah? No more wine."

You gasped. "Agent Hotchner, I am a federal agent of the government. I know when I should be cut off."

"Oh, my god, get her off the phone."

You don't know who said it, but it sent you spiraling into another round of giggles, the phone slipping through your fingers while JJ pounced on it.

"Hey!"

She held up a hand, keeping the device just out of reach.

"Yeah, she's pretty drunk." JJ said, then frowned. "Hotch, listen she's more of a lightweight than we realized." You slumped against the chair. "Yes, sir. Goodnight, sir."

JJ ended the call and placed it back into your hands. "I cannot wait until you remember this in the morning," she sang, before casting a glance to the others. "Also, a heads-up--Will's almost here."

"No!" It came out louder than intended, almost a shout, as you stood, sending Spencer's pens tumbling. "Whoopsie." You latched onto Penelope, murmuring, "Stay here, don't leave me."

Penelope's laughter rang out, her hands cradling your head. "Worry not, I've set the security guy straight--if you get even a scratch, I'll make him regret the day he was born."

"See, this is why you're my favorite," you whispered.

"Heard that."

Will eventually texted JJ, letting her know he had arrived. As the they waited by the elevator, the doors slid open to reveal Hotch standing there. A squeal escaped you, matched by his single raised eyebrow surveying your condition.

Your cheeks were painted a rosy tint, hair in a delightful tangle, and your shirt hanging askew off your shoulder--you were an adorable spectacle of disorder, and he found himself suppressing the small smile that threatened to reveal his amusement as the other girls filed into the elevator.

He had made them promise not to leave until he got there, not keen on the idea of you being left alone like this. It might have been an exaggeration, but when you butt dialed him and he heard the sound of your slurred speech it had him envisioning all sorts of worst-case scenarios. Sure, he had seen you drink during team nights out, but nothing like this.

"Hotch!" You shouted, moving to him with a rapidity that might be, well definitely, was ill-advised.

He stood motionless as you looped your arms around his neck. You smelled so nice--a sweet hint of vanilla instead of the anticipated alcohol. After a brief hesitation, his hands slowly found their way to your waist.

"What are you doing here, silly?" You ask, pulling back just enough to see his face. "Wait a second, please don't say we have a case."

A subtle smile played on his face, his hand not budging from your back. "No, there's no case."

"Oh, good," you murmured, your head bobbing lightly in approval. The light touch of your fingers at the base of his neck spread a warmth through him. "You want a drink? I think there's still some wine left."

"No, I'm fine," he said, clearing his throat and taking a step back. "I think you need to get to bed."

Your hands lingered at his neck, softly exploring his hair as you looked up with a smile that made his pulse race unexpectedly.

"Is that an order as my boss or a suggestion as my friend?"

He raised his brow. "Both?"

"Well, okay," you shrugged as you took a step back. "Wanna see my room? I don't think you've seen it yet. Everyone else has."

Without giving him a chance to object, you dashed down the hallway. He trailed behind with reluctance, knowing just how dangerous this could be for him. He was all too aware that he shouldn't be here, let alone in your room in your current, wine-fueled state.

You fumbled for the light, fingers slipping before finding the switch as you stumbled into the cramped room. It was pink. Very pink. The pullout couch was lost beneath a mountain of pillows, excessive by any standard. Your closet was bursting, and a collection of gadgets and gizmos had overtaken the room, but he liked it, a lot.

Your collapse onto the bed sent pillows scattering to the floor, his mind wandered about the unseen details of your bedroom at home, and even more so, the thought of what a shared space between you two might look like.

A sigh escaped him as he stood over you. "How about changing into your pajamas first, hm?"

"No thank you."

"You're going to hate yourself if you wake up in jeans tomorrow."

"Fine." You pouted, propping yourself up on your elbows. "Top right drawer please."

He shot you a look but obliged anyway. There was something about that puckered out bottom lip that made him think he'd do just about anything you asked, like he was putty in your hands. Pulling out the most conservative pair of pajamas from the sparse selection, he made a mental note to ask about that later.

"Thank you," you said with a smile. He really liked your smile. "You know, you're really such a nice person, Hotch. Or—Can I call you Aaron? Just tonight?"

He felt a sudden emptiness in his chest as the air was knocked out. "You can call me Aaron. Just tonight."

A high-pitched squeal escaped you as you began shedding your clothes. He offered a stifled cough, quickly averting his gaze and nudging the door closed with his free hand.

"Well, Aaron," you said plainly, "I really like you."

The effort it took for him not to pivot on his heel was immense, particularly when your voice sweetened like honey at the mention of his name.

"You're a great boss."

"I like you too, Agent."

"No, you don't, well, I mean—you can turn around now," you said. "You like me, but I really like you. It's not the same."

As he turned to face you, he could sense his cock twitching in his pants, a physical reaction to the sight of you fumbling with your shirt, your tits exposed in full view, as if begging to be touched.

"Christ," he hissed, gripping the ends of your shirt and yanking down. He was sure you were going to hate yourself in the morning. "You're not making sense, and I think you need to sleep it off."

"Yeah," you replied, your eyes warmly meeting his as you gave him a lopsided smile. "You know, I don't think I've ever seen you in such casual clothes, Aaron. You look very handsome."

He needed to get you to bed before he did something he'd regret. He softly nudged your shoulders backward, offering no verbal response. You surrendered to the motion with complaint, your remaining strength insufficient for anything else.

Softly, he settled to blankets around you, taking a moment to study you, with the intention of memorizing you completely (even the part of you that was far too drunk).

"Goodnight, Aaron."

He summoned all his restraint to keep from crashing his lips into yours. He smoothed back your hair, allowing himself that as he shot you a tired smile. "Goodnight."

He hadn't even touched the doorknob when your plea reached his ears. "Aaron, I—, will you stay with me?"

And who was he to deny you anything?

next part!

taglist: @chronicallybubbly

[ninyard]

Heyy! You said someone should ask you about Kevin under this post about Kevin's struggles from the nest of which we don't know enough... So I'm asking you about Kevin! Please tell us your Kevin thoughts! You always make very good points and I like reading your thoughts!!

cody my friend I am so glad you asked but you might regret it. i hope you're prepared from an unorganised huge convoluted MESS of a ramble

i've been thinking for a few days about this one like... what would a kevin POV look like? what is he hiding? how does he cope? WHO IS HE?

the kevin we ""know"" is a "coward", an insufferable bitch, an asshole and a hardass. other people's opinions and view of him makes up the entirety of our impression of who he is. but that's not who he is. that's just who we're supposed to believe he is.

kevin, born and bred to have this... borderline psychopathic lack of empathy, who can look his teammates in the eye after being told seth is dead or andrew is being committed and say, "what about the game?"

but when the raven's are switching districts; his sense of danger and fear is paralysing. he's three steps ahead trying to figure out how to please riko, how to keep himself safe, willing to put himself back into the centre of his abuse just to stop riko from finding him and killing him. he has to get blackout drunk to deal with any amount of riko. he's frozen with fear by being in the same room as him.

kevin knows where jean's mind and body goes to when hes panicking, knowing his worst place is right back in the nest being drowned by riko. kevin telling neil "do you know what he'll do to you?" and "he'll break you" when neil asks for his ticket. kevin's text to him before he goes into the nest, and staring at neil like he'd seen a ghost when neil returns after the nest (when he looks like the butcher). his comforting "i know what he's like" or "i know how he sees you, i know it means he did not hold back,".

kevin nervous breakdown panic attack day vs kevin smile for the cameras one track exy mind day

im so intrigued by him. how does he cope? his mother is dead, probably killed by the mafia family he was raised by. he grew up into a cult, he was only a child watching neil's father cut a man into pieces in front of him. how many other's had he seen?

how many other injuries cover his body, in places where the cameras can't see? how many rapes and assaults was he forced to watch in the nest? how many beatings was he forced to participate in? what did he have to say to jean in french that he didn't want riko to hear?

he needs someone with him all the time because of the nest. he's a "health freak" because of the nest. his sleep schedule, his anger, his anxiety.

did he say "what about the season?" re: andrew after drake because he doesn't care, or did he think "i've seen this happen too many times. and they've always kept playing,"? did he think "andrew is the strongest person i know. andrew is stronger than me. he would never let this destroy him," knowing that it has?

nobody has protected him in his life apart from the cameras and andrew.

he's scared. he doesn't know what love is supposed to look like.

he's only been a human for a year.

his scars are healing for the first time in his life and they're not being replaced by new ones, but every day he's afraid that that's going to get ripped out from underneath him. his entire life already got flipped upside down when he left the nest. of course exy is the only thing he "cares" about.

because it's the only thing that's been certain in his life, and even for those few weeks or months where he thought he would never play again, he trained and trained, and learned how to use his non-dominant hand because he can't lose this. he can't lose exy like he's lost everything else.

kevin has never had anything stable in his life except for violence and exy. now he has people he's supposed to care about, and he has to change his priorities. he has to learn how live a life that isn't fueled by self-preservation for the first time ever.

jean was only in the nest for five years; and look at him. look at what the nest has done to his social skills, his view of himself, his self esteem. look at what it's done to him, how he expects violence and contrition, coach and always waiting and waiting and waiting for the punishment to come.

kevin might not have had the same level of physical abuse that jean had, but he was there far longer. the ravens existed before him; their mindset and their abuse and their violence and their poison.

he's been drinking the raven poison since his childhood. the only difference between him and jean other than those things above is that kevin had more pressure to hide it, because he was half of the face of the ravens, half of the face of Exy; media trained or PR trained or a master at being a fraud and faking the way he speaks when he's being recorded.

kevin knows how to hide his abuse because he has always had to, and he's had quite a lot of practice at it.

kevin has only been a human for a year. kevin has only been kevin for a year.

so who is he? does he even know?

or is he just Kevin Day, Raven Fox starting striker, number two, six foot two, left handed right handed left handed, heavy racquet, stick size five? is that all he will ever see himself as?

anyways. or something like that. maybe he is just an insufferable bitch for no reason at all. who knows!

[winterchimez]

Lavender Haze | Kevin Moon

SUMMARY: being an idol's partner has never been easy to say the least, but your boyfriend Kevin was going to make sure that you've made the right decision to spend the rest of your life with him.

PAIRING: idol!Kevin x f!reader

GENRE: hurt & comfort, fluff, suggestive, established relationship

WARNINGS: nc-17, self-doubt, crying, kissing, making out (it gets a little spicy), petnames (kitten), hickeys

WORD COUNT: 2,518

A/N: happiest birthday to @jinkoh 💛 thank you for being such a good friend and here's to more chaos & late night convos tgt 🫶 and thankiew @blizzardfluffykpop for being my partner in crime for this (yes kate and i planned this all out just for you 🤭) gonna tag @hyungseos-cafe too bcs well, it's kevin 🙂‍↕️

Your phone was constantly buzzing every minute, and the notification ping was starting to annoy you while you were packing up to get off work. It hasn’t been the best day at the office, but you’ve grown to accept it since it was pretty much the reality of working as a corporate girl.

Though you have to admit that things haven’t been the best for you recently, and you knew that it was starting to take a toll on your mental well-being—to the point it made you question your relationship with your boyfriend. 

You knew that going into a relationship with Kevin wouldn’t be easy. Frankly, you hesitated at the beginning when he asked you out and officially proposed if you’d like to work things out as a couple. As much as you loved him and basically grew up together since kindergarten, there was something that somehow terrifies you when it comes to dating a celebrity.

The moment Kevin gave up his university programme to become an idol, you were shocked and slightly disappointed to say the least—being all sulky throughout your 4-year degree programme because your best friend literally ditched you all alone back in university.

But you knew that you should be proud of him, given that he always had a fondness when it came to making music. You knew that spending countless years on the piano and taking up random gigs during the weekends at your local drinking bar had definitely paid off when he got accepted and was offered to start a new chapter back in Seoul.

Those couple of years while he was away were tough, and you could only keep up with one another through texts and calls once every couple of months. Things started to ease a little when he finally debuted and was granted more time and expenses to make a trip back to Canada to visit once in a while, which was when you started to realise that your feelings towards him were more than just friends. 

Spending late nights going on a road trip to stargazing at the cabin his uncle owned, it was there where you both would rendezvous whenever you had the chance to escape from reality for a bit. Talking to him about everything became a priority and habit, and little did you both know, your hands began to intertwine whenever you got cozy at the fireplace outside of the cabin. 

You certainly did not expect him to confess to you right when you dropped him off at the airport 3 years ago, and he was staying put until you had given him a proper answer—not caring if he was going to miss his flight. It was then that you clearly showed hesitation in your eyes, and Kevin knew that he wasn’t going to force you to do it if you weren’t ready. Still, he gave you the best hug he has ever given you over the past decade and planted a soft kiss on your forehead—caressing your warm cheeks gently as he firmly voiced out that he was expecting good news the moment he touched down in Seoul.

What he did then was enough to keep you up the entire night, tossing and turning in your bed, getting little to no sleep at all. You scrolled through your phone and through all the pictures and messages you exchanged, trying to make sense of whether whatever you felt inside was as simple as he did.

Love. 

And just like that, you finally sent him a simple “I’m in” and quickly threw your phone onto your nightstand before you desperately closed your eyes to get at least a wink of sleep. It only took him a few hours to quickly give you a video call to express how happy he was, and he swore that he would make you the happiest girl alive.

And never in your life have you seen him being the happiest he’s ever been.

Just like that, you were convinced that everything would be okay, and you had made the right decision. Doing a long-distance relationship for 2 years was certainly not easy, but you both pulled through and made things work to the best of your abilities. It wasn’t until a year ago that you secured a promotion to work at Korea’s department, and you immediately informed Kevin of the good news.

Your boyfriend wasted no time quickly packing his bags and moving out of his dorm, making his dormmate Jacob a little sad with the sudden decision, but he supported you both nonetheless. Living in central Seoul was slightly overwhelming to you if you were to be completely honest. Still, you knew that Kevin needed it to be able to get to his schedules easily and on time, and it would cut your commute time to work by half—just little things that would make lives easier and give up on the countryside life for now. 

With Kevin’s popularity increasing each day, however, it just seems as if a lot more pressure was placed on you as both of your relationships progressed. It wasn’t too much about privacy, but more on how you have been asked countless times when you were finally going to settle down with your boyfriend.

The constant asks and messages about your marriage to keeping up with your celebrity boyfriend’s fame was starting to take a toll on your well-being, making you think that you’re just not enough to be with him. 

The self-doubt grew stronger each day, and more messages were constantly coming into your emails, as much as you despised them. You were grateful that Kevin had been away for the past couple of weeks, and you had all the apartment to yourself as you dealt with your feelings. Given that he was busy with his new comeback with his team, the last thing you wanted to do was to give him more trouble and worry about his girlfriend back at home. 

You both called and texted each day, but you’ve always made sure to leave out the negative part and only tell him about the good things that happened at work. Though, you tried to avoid video calls since you were certain that he would immediately notice you have been deteriorating the moment his eyes lay upon your exhausted look. Hence, you kept insisting that you had a red eye and didn’t want to hear him nagging, so voice calls are the way to go for now. 

Taking those heavy steps as you walked up to your apartment unit, you lazily inserted the key and twisted it to expect the clicking sound as you unlocked the door. 

Except for the fact that the door immediately creaked open instead, and there was the familiar figure cooking something up in the kitchen. And at the very same time, you could tell that he noticed your presence as you heard the stove being turned off, and his shadow was now approaching the front door.

Oh no, crap. What do I do what do I do-

“My love! It’s been a while…” Kevin instantly paused when he saw the look on your face. Those undeniably dark undereyes and dishevelled hair were too obvious to pass, and he knew that you had hidden something from him. 

You simply sighed before lowering your head down to stare at the doormat. “You came back…” 

“Y/N. What happened? Why didn’t you tell me?” Kevin immediately got down to your level to look straight at you in the eyes, which was enough to make you break down and burst into tears right in front of your boyfriend. 

This was certainly not something you wanted him to see the moment he got home. In fact, you should’ve been the one who was welcoming him back with the house all cleaned up, a comfy meal that was prepared on the table, and perhaps even a warm, cozy bath-

Before you could even put all the blame on yourself, Kevin instantly pulled you in for a hug—caressing through your silky hair as he rested his lips on you. It was then that you hugged him tighter, taking in the familiar sense of comfort that you’ve simply missed over the past couple of weeks. 

And that scent, oh god, how much you’ve missed what he actually smelled like. 

Kevin knew, and he wasn’t the type of guy to push you to spit out everything, so he simply got you undressed and cleaned you up, pampering you in the shower. At the same time, he treated you like a baby—jokingly throwing in some rubber duckies to keep you company while you soaked in the warm liquid. That silly little gesture made you chuckle for a bit, and the smile you’ve grown to love was plastered once more on your boyfriend’s face. 

He wasted no time helping you put on your favourite keroppi pyjamas before taking you back onto the couch to snuggle while you both catch up with everything while chewing on the comforting ochazuke he cooked up. Putting on a comforting romcom show was the way to go whenever you both wanted a good laugh and to reminisce about your university days, and it never fails to brighten up the mood between you two. 

As the final credits came on, Kevin simply pulled you in closer and whispered into your ears. “I hope you’re feeling a lot better now.”

It was then that you remembered that you had had a mental breakdown a few hours ago, and you had avoided telling Kevin about how you truly felt about your relationship for the past couple of weeks. It was simply that good that he made you forget about all the stress and prejudice in life whenever you were with him. 

But you knew that you couldn’t run from your problems forever, so you simply positioned yourself in front of him before grabbing his hands and taking in a deep sigh, mustering up all the courage you had to speak to him about your most inner thoughts.

“Kevin…t-there’s something I need to talk to you about.” 

Your boyfriend instantly noticed the change in the tone of your voice and knew that this would be a rather deep conversation. In response, he adjusted his position to face you completely, ensuring he was now all ears for everything you had to say. 

“What are we?” 

Kevin was perplexed by those three simple words. He had no idea what was going on at this point. He expected you to tell him something bad happened at work or how you’ve been feeling under the weather for a while, but certainly not about your relationship. 

“Y/N. What are you getting-” 

“I-I don’t even know myself- I just feel- like I’m never good enough to keep up with your pace, Kevin. At least not anymore-” You started to sob as you moved your hands up to rub away the tears with your sweater. 

“What makes you think that, Y/N? You do remember I promised that I would make you the happiest girl alive-”

“I do, but I don’t know if I’m even worth your time anymore. People keep asking if I was merely someone who would be in your life temporarily, or pressuring me to settle down with you officially. I don’t know- I mean- with you getting all booked and busy, I just don’t think there’s room for me to even be part of your life anymore-” 

Before you could even finish all the raging thoughts you’ve had in your head, you were taken aback when you suddenly felt something wet and soft rest upon your lips, and you knew exactly how those familiar lips of your boyfriend felt. 

You've memorized every curve of his lips and the way they moved against yours. You never used to believe people when they said some lips were simply meant for each other—but with Kevin, you felt it. He never missed a spot, knowing exactly how to stir butterflies in your stomach with every kiss.

Shutting your eyes as you felt a teardrop fall down your cheeks, you relaxed almost immediately as you slowly felt numb, and your back was gently pushed down onto the couch. Kevin quickly intertwined your fingers and pushed both of your hands to each side, removing any sort of obstacles that could possibly be in the way. 

He swallowed your moans with his kiss, and he wasted no time pushing in further to ensure that you were clear on how nothing else matters except for being with him right now. He doesn’t want you to think about any of those, and hell, even doubted yourself in the slightest. As he broke off the kiss, moved down, and brushed your neck, he paused briefly before whispering into your ears.

“You’re my little lavender haze, and you’re bound to stay with me forever.”

Your eyes slowly started to flutter open as the ray of sunshine fell straight onto your face. Rubbing your eyes as you slowly sat up, you realised that you’d been tucked to bed after last night’s events, and your eyes widened as you saw yourself in the mirror right across at the foot of your bed. 

There was a pretty obvious red mark situated right on your exposed collarbone, and you slowly moved your fingers up to feel that same exact spot. A tingling sensation ran through your spine as you placed too much pressure on it, and then you realised that there was a little hue of purple on it too. 

Wait, does that mean-

Before anything else could’ve happened, you were dragged back down onto the bed, falling straight onto your boyfriend’s arms as he pulled you in for another kiss. He groggily replies a simple good morning before pulling you in for a cuddle, refusing to wake up just yet.

“K-Kevin…” you mumbled.

“Hmm?”

“T-This mark…what have you done last night?” 

There was a silent pause right after that, and you had to shake your boyfriend a little to ensure he wasn’t falling back asleep again. But before you could change your tactics and start questioning him more again, he groans as he finally moves to the point he’s on top of you right now. 

“Ugh, stop asking so many questions, for god’s sake,” Kevin replied as he looked down at you with a smirk plastered across his face, one that you knew it wasn’t going to end up well and you wished you could’ve taken back everything that you’ve done a minute prior.

“K-Kevin- I-” 

He immediately shuts you up with another kiss, hungrily this time, before pulling apart as his fingers roam through your skin and stopping right at the same mark that he had made the night prior—pressing it a little for that pressure to make you whimper just a little bit.

“Seems like you haven’t learnt your lesson yet, little kitten. This time, I’m going to make sure you remember that you’re stuck with me for life, and you’re a thousand years early to think that you can escape my grasp.”

masterlist

taglist: @deoboyznet @kflixnet @k-films @flwoie @gluion @kyusqult @tinkerbell460 @sulkygyu @jaerisdiction @lngwayup @djidfk @Doorhak @adorhak @daisyvisions (join my permanent taglist here!)

[mirrorball-leclerc]

big reputations - part two

series masterlist // previous // next

AN INTERVIEW WITH DANIEL RICCIARDO (EXCERPT)

comments

user1 nah, the interviewer was so wrong for this. you know he wanted to say himself.

user2 daniel's blushing over this. i just know it.

user3 fernando is probably giggling over all of this. we've all see the tiktoks he's posted.

user4 daniel dragged his best friend along to see his future gf at a concert.

user5 this man is giggling like a schoolgirl over a woman who's not even his girlfriend.

user6 daniel, baby, this isn't like you. what about our farm, our six dogs, 3 kids, 2 goats, 12 chickens, and 4 cows?

↳ user7 babygorl, delulu is not the solulu. not this time.

↳ user8 girl wants to raise a whole ass fucking zoo

↳ user6 i've grown up in the country, i am surrounded by animals

↳ user8 that explains it

user9 the interviewer heard we wanted the tea on what happened at the eras tour and she was not going to stop until she got answers. too bad daniel is good at keeping secrets

user10 oh this man so desperately wanted to say himself but had to stop from doing so.

alex albon i get asked about the eras tour one more time i will lose it!

max verstappen someone's bitter they didn't get a chance to go. alex albon YES! I AM! IT'S ALL LILY WILL TALK ABOUT! WE DESERVED THE RIGHT TO GO!

daniel ricciardo well that's up for debate. i waited ages in line to buy those tickets. did you?

alex albon YOU TOOK MAX AND P?? BUT NOT ME OR LILY?

daniel ricciardo i only had three extra tickets??

lando norris THREE? WHO WAS THE THIRD??

daniel ricciardo kelly? penelope's mom?

lando norris oh. i forgot about that.

charles leclerc you forgot penelope had a mother?

lando norris i plead the fifth

logan sargeant YOU'RE BRITISH?? THAT DOESN'T WORK ON YOU! lando norris I CAN BE WHATEVER I WANT TO BE! logan sargeant OF COURSE YOU CAN YOU'RE A COLONIZER! lando norris AT LEAST WE DON'T HAVE SCHOOL SHOOTINGS! logan sargeant YOU CAN'T USE THE SAME FUCKING COMEBACK EVERY TIME ASSHOLE! oscar piastri okay, we are not doing this again logan sargeant YOU STAY OUT OF THIS KOALA!

lewis hamilton can you three be mature?

logan sargeant in the words of the colonizer, 'i don't wanna mature'

fernando alonso por dios, estan locos. (my god, they're crazy)

sergio perez obvio, no estan nada normal (obviously, they're not normal)

george russell i don't speak spanish but all i understood was normal.

alex albon because it's spelled the same way in spanish and english

carlos sainz they're talking shit about the three stooges.

george russell thank you siri!

kevin magnussen so daniel how's your hand?

daniel ricciardo thanks for asking kevin! at least i know someone here cares about my wellbeing.

daniel ricciardo i'm currently texting with one hand because i have to go into surgery soon. it's only a broken bone. if i don't make it back don't let fernando date daphne jones!

max verstappen glad to know you have your priorities straight.

daniel ricciardo of course.

¡leclerc-s speaks! you cannot convince me that logan and lando haven't had a similar argument at least once and poor oscar was stuck as mediator between them.

¡disclaimer! this is in no way making assumptions about the people involved in this story, this is all fake. it is a fanfiction please don't take any of what is said seriously. this is all for entertainment purposes and as a creative outlet for me. enjoy!

[eeriethacus]

I will never not get over Kevin Day's response to a man dying being "what about the line-up", like man got his priorities straight, and honestly, good for him.

[ironworked]

911 and closure

We've all already talked about how Buck and Tommy's relationship is different from his previous ones, and how the breakup itself is also different.

But what about other breakups? (I'm very probably not saying anything new and there might be clown makeup all over this, but I need to yap)

Chim proposed to Tatiana, who couldn't say yes and ended up breaking up with Chim while he recovered from his rebar-through-the-skull injury. They ran into each other at the hospital months later and met for drinks a different day.

Hen was visited by Eva as part of her 12-steps program before leaving LA (Karen went to see Eva too).

Maddie was kidnapped by Doug and killed him 🔪. Later she revisited the scene (with therapist Frank) so she could really let him go.

Non-romantic relationships/events? Chim and the Lees had a ceremony for Kevin in s7; Bobby had his talk with Amir; Athena solved that old case from her childhood, then also found Emmett's killer and made peace with him...

Then we have this firefighter with the 118 who was on a date when his partner dropped a bomb on him. He had to talk to his people and think about his future, and on the next date decided to take a step forward in the relationship, but his partner left him instead.

I could be talking about Buck and Tommy, but you know who else?

Eddie and Shannon.

She wanted to divorce, and then she died. And here's Eddie, who still hasn't found closure for this relationship.

Of course they are different people, with different personalities and baggage, and different conflicts. It's not about paralleling the relationships. What I mean is that Eddie and Shannon's relationship was truncated, and he still canonically mourns not just what could have been, but the chance to say his piece.

Now, we have Buck and Tommy whose breakup has the same beats but a completely different significance (Shannon expressing different priorities vs Tommy's fear) and a radically different aftermath (Shannon died; Tommy is bubbling Buck). Sub-zero closure.

So we have three options now:

The story ends here. This would make it rare in this show's history, and either make Tommy The One Who Got Away for Buck, or they'll have to weirdly move on like nothing happened. The first is just unsatisfactory, and the second unlikely given they just said it's the most transformative relationship since/surpassing Abby (depending on how you read that line) and they aired that texting scene.

They give them closure. This is more 911's style. The downside is that they'll have put Buck on the hamster wheel again, but the bar will have been raised for any new LI (will be compared to both Abby and Tommy, etc).

Second chance. 911 is also the second (and third, and fourth) chances show. The upside is that they don't have to create or cast a new LI, but Buck isn't super settled already either; they could have them take things slow if that's a concern in the writers room.

Which one will they choose?

Well, I obviously don't know, but I'd say that if it were #1 they could/would have made the breakup itself more final (just changing 'See you around, Buck' to 'Goodbye, Buck' would have done it) and/or not included the texting.

The texting! I keep going back to that, because we already have the whole Buck Baking Thing that came with an explanation and a visual; it's now shorthand for 'Buck misses Tommy' so the emphasis on texting is superfluous unless it's leading somewhere isn't it?

[mr-wrestlemania]

craving for some shawnter, but not sure if you want to do that!??

JOKES ON YOU IM INTO THAT SHIT

Heres an appetizer

Ao3 Link: https://archiveofourown.org/works/59825641

Contains: fluff about Hunters quad injury and wanting Shawns attention.

It all happened so fast, two torn quads, and Hunter still continued the match. Shawn had seen it before. Their boss tore both his quads and couldn't walk. Kevin had done the same and couldn't pick himself up. He understood why Hunter kept the show rolling but goddamn he hated it.

He had sat in the waiting room waiting for Hunter to get discharged after he got the phone call. Of course, they had to triple check that he was stable enough given the severity of his injury, but it didn't make the wait any more bearable

Shawn read a national geographic magazine that was on a nearby table just to distract himself. Just when his mind began to drift, he heard the soft footsteps of someone walking toward him.

"Shawn Michaels? Mr.Helmsley is ready. Are you driving him back home?" A nurse had her clipboard resting under one of her arms while she spun her pen in her other hand restlessly.

Shawn put the magazine down and shot onto his feet, "Yes! Yes. He's wheelchair bound, for now, right?"

The nurse nodded, "It's advised he minimizes his walking as much as possible. Here, I have instructions on his recovery treatment and a list of the medications for him."

Medications?

Of course.. Shawn knew he'd need pain meds. Hunter wasn't as bad as himself, so addiction wasn't a concern. It was the image of seeing a drugged up Hunter that made his stomach twist.

"Thank you." He tucked the papers away under his arm and perked seeing another nurse wheel out Hunter. "There you are.."

The glazed look on Hunter's face melted upon seeing Shawn, and he flashed a half smile. "Hey.."

"I'll move the car just hang tight, okay?" Shawn ran out the doors while the nurses got Hunter outside.

He wasn't even gone that long, but Hunter ached for Shawn to come back. Maybe it was the medication he was on, but everything felt unreal without him.

Shawn pulled up and helped get the door open on the passenger side. The nurses didn't need him to assist, but he stood by anxiously. They were just doing their job but fuck Shawn wanted to be useful.

The nurses helped Hunter get into the car and folded up the wheelchair to be put in the backseat. "Call us if you have questions or concerns."

"Thank you." Shawn nodded and got back into the car.

Hunter felt like he could finally breathe once Shawn was beside him. He reached for Shawn's arm and gripped Shawn's sleeve tightly. Shawn raised his brows a little and looked at the bigger man softly.

"Grabby hands already?" Shawn chuckled and leaned over so Hunter could wrap his arms around him.

"Mmm." Hunter wasted no time and held onto Shawn like he hadn't seen him in years. His head rested on Shawn's shoulder, but he pulled it back up before he could doze off.

Shawn rubbed Hunter's face and smiled, "It's okay. I'll get us home and you can sleep with me all you want. Not like that, though. You are out of commission for fucking too."

"Really..? And you're okay with that?" Hunter watched Shawn as he started to drive off.

"Uh, duh. Your health comes first. I mean, there might be other things, but that's not my priority right now. Getting you home and comfortable is."

Hunter smiled and began to close his eyes. Everything felt right when Shawn was beside him. He could relax but didn't really doze off like his body wanted to. The noises of the car and Shawns humming kept him from falling asleep, not that he was complaining. He missed all of it.

"You falling asleep on me? Hey." Shawn nudged him after he put the car in park.

"Mmm-no." Hunter stretched his arms and yawned, "I think I spaced out with my eyes closed.."

"Suuure suure." Shawn unclicked his seatbelt and got out to ready the wheelchair.

When he turned around, he braced himself for the next hurdle. He lifted guys bigger than Hunter. He could do this. Shawn opened the car door and supported Hunter with his arm.

"Okay. Ready?"

Hunter sighed, "I hate this."

"I know, but docs orders." Shawn grunted as he got Hunter up. His feet barely touched the ground before he was slowly lowered into the wheelchair. "Hah! There we go.."

Hunter was impressed by Shawn's demonstration of strength and looked up at him. "Im not used to seeing you from this angle."

"Surprise, I have a lot of good angles." Shawn winked and rolled Hunter into the house.

After unpacking Hunter's things, Shawn was reading the papers the nurse gave him. He was sat on the edge of their bed while Hunter got comfortable.

"Shaaawn.." Hunter whined quietly.

"Im barely through page two, Hunter." Shawn sighed. "Will you let me read them later?"

Hunter opened his arms and nodded.

Shawn carefully slid into one of Hunter's arms, and Hunter leaned his head on top of Shawn's. "I missed my sexyboy. My boytoy." He hummed.

"Mmm, I missed my king." Shawn kissed his cheek.

The King of Kings could finally fall asleep with Shawn close by. He'd much rather spoon him, but his quads weren't game for much moving. The fact that Shawn was the one to take on the caretaking made his cheeks red at the idea.

Shawn closed his eyes and smiled at the sound of Hunter's soft snoring. God, he missed it. Perhaps a nap wouldn't hurt him either. He was so stressed about Hunters injury that he hardly slept the past few days.

That didn't matter anymore. They were finally together again and could rest in each others arms.

[wherevenusholdssomeofficespace]

Stress Brawl was such a fantastic episode. Really elaborating on Hiromi's character. Hamster and Gretel at the very least is pretty good on building on previously established lore. It's satisfying when a typical joke gets referenced in a new context.

Seeing how Hiromi's reputation as a nice person, and her involvement in several activities actually stresses her out really added a layer of depth to her character. Hiromi was also established to have a more subtle cynical side that was annoyed by people's dependence on her. So it was good to see that expanded upon more as something that she represses.

Hiromi could very easily have been Kevin's "Nice but quirky" love interest but she's more than that and it's good to see. Not that Hiromi was ever that, but as she was quickly established as a character who existed beyond being Kevin's love interest. But seeing her continued development as a full fledged character raises the show's quality all around.

I think Hiromi serves a rather important anchoring role to the story as a well developed character who isn't involved in the superhero stuff or the Grant-Gomez family. She informs a lot of the high school setting and the stuff that goes on there. When it comes to saving the world type shows I find a well developed civilian cast is critical to giving the stakes weight. Her relationships with both Kevin and Fred also helps round out both characters by giving them someone who isn't each other to bounce off of.

Seeing Fred of course simply being Hiromi's friend and trying to support her is good to see. Not to mention how the fallout from her and Kevin's failed date was handled. Kevin has already been established to be a very stressed out person. Just he has a superhero little sister to deal with rather than a heap of extracurriculars. So it's interesting to see how they both had sort of similar reactions to their disaster date. Maybe one day they'll get together and be stressed about stuff together.

But for now Hiromi and Kevin is doomed by their inability to get on the same page. It's not Kevin's fault. It's not his fault he's got a part time job as a superhero coach and that his identity was revealed to an evil villain trying to take over the world thus making it impossible for him to commit to things or be honest about himself. It's not that Kevin didn't do anything wrong per se. Because a fake date was not the way to go. But he didn't have bad intentions. Usually fake dates are terrible because they're done out of an intent to manipulate the other person's feelings. But it was consensual on both members of the fake couple. And Kevin was doing it not to make Hiromi jealous in hopes of getting together with her, but to help them move on from the incident... which wasn't what she actually wanted. But Kevin genuinely had Hiromi's best interests in mind.

I don't think Hiromi is completely blameless in this either. Her refusal to talk to Kevin, instead just letting it go without any sort of catharsis left him unsure on how to actually proceed with their relationship in the way she wanted. But it's not her fault her crush stood her up with an empty explanation. Hiromi showed that she feels underappreciated, and she does deserve to have a boyfriend who actually makes her a priority. How could she know Kevin was literally kidnapped from their date.

But their relationship simply cannot proceed unless Hiromi finds out about Gretel's secret. And honestly, I suspect it's only a matter of time. This show isn't exactly stingy on the reveals. Though, even if the reveal happens, it won't necessarily fix everything. It's very possible Hiromi could still be hurt by Kevin (and Fred!!!) keeping a secret from her despite them being friends (I mean, Bailey knows). But only time will tell with how this plays out I suppose.

[otdiaftg]

When Wymack dismisses them for break Andrew immediately sets off down the length of the court wall. Renee glances at Neil. Neil isn't sure it is an invitation until he turns toward her and gets an approving smile. He is keenly aware that they are attracting attention as they set off after Andrew, but Neil doesn't look back at anyone.

There was a good chance the others didn't want him hanging out with the goalies, and it wasn't because it meant he and Kevin were still on the outs. The Foxes might be leery of Andrew and Renee's friendship, but there was over three hundred dollars in the pot on their would-be relationship working out. Neil distracted them from each other. Neil harbored no such illusions about Renee's chances. Besides, Renee did a good enough job distracting herself. She faded out of the conversation several times to check her phone and tap out quick messages. Neil picked up a little of the slack because they were planning evacuation routes and critical supply stops in case of a zombie invasion. Surviving on the run was Neil's forte and, even though it was a ridiculous scenario, it was interesting to see how his priorities compared with theirs. Renee stressed the importance of collecting survivors, which Andrew shot down immediately. "You wouldn't go back for anyone?" Renee asked. Andrew turned his hand over. "I can count them on one hand." "I think Coach would be good in a fight," Renee said as they passed the benches again. Wymack glanced their way, hearing his name, but only needed a moment to realize they weren't talking to him. "He's got a weapons permit, too." "He sold the gun when I kept breaking into his apartment," Andrew said. "What about Abby?" "What use is she to me?" Andrew asked. "You can't bandage a zombie bite and she wouldn't let us execute the infected. Besides, Coach wouldn't let her leave his sight. Let him keep her safe as long as he can." Renee conceded the point with a nod, and the conversation moved on to less crazy ideas. It stuck with Neil, though, and he tuned out their next debate. He wondered what he'd do if an invasion really happened. Neil was used to cutting all ties and hitting the ground running. Chances were it'd be instinctive to abandon all of them if the undead put in a ravenous appearance. It wasn't exactly an uplifting realization, but Neil could accept the ugly truths about himself.

Day: Tuesday, January 16th Time: 4:45 PM EST

[foxstens]

time to elaborate on the 'everything happens bc andrew got kevin pregnant idea'

*came up with it because kevin disappeared from the public eye for 9 months

except i'm having trouble coming up with a scenario that would work.

a raven!andrew au is the most straightfoward but it messes with the premise in the first place. if he gets pregnant in the nest and then stays there, what are the options? try to hide it? wouldn't work. tell someone? they'd force him to get rid of it. get rid of it on his own? also wouldn't work. unless he would be allowed (and or forced) to keep it for some reason, but why???

what else. uhhh well since riko breaks his hand at the time of the winter banquet, perhaps kevin and andrew hook up at the winter banquet? it would delay things by a bit and then how the fuck would kevin escape if riko doesn't break his hand? and what about the entire plot point of kevin being better than riko? does that just not happen? maybe the erc doesn't notice or maybe tetsuji doesn't pit them against each other or maybe it does happen riko just doesn't get as angry because kevin lets him win in the end??

except i don't see them hooking up just out of the blue. kevin probably wouldn't even think of that with riko and everyone so close, especially if he had just been accused of being better than riko. andrew probably also wouldn't be up for it considering ~everything.

unless they kept in touch since they tried recruiting andrew to the ravens? but even then they'd def be extra cautious.

if we handwave the setup though, thinking about what happens next is very fun. kevin finding out and calling andrew in a panic, whisper-yelling because how the fuck did this happen his life is over what the fuck does he do and andrew just fucking shuts down for a second because what except he's on his meds so he tells kevin to just get rid of it but he knows enough about kevin's situation to understand that's not a possibility and he's andrew fucking minyard and he can't not take responsibility.

and this is kevin so of course the priority is to make sure kevin's safe and they'll figure the rest out later, so he tells wymack(????????) and they arrange to get kevin out of there somehow (????????) maybe jean is on it too because he'd understand in this scenario????? or maybe he's not and he wouldn't, idk.

so then kevin is out and he's still having a meltdown and andrew is also quietly having a meltdown and so is wymack because what the fuck but they hold it together somehow and then they have to talk about it and decide what to do but that's not at all easy when kevin is now having a meltdown because he just ran away from the fucking nest and riko is going to kill jean and then he's going to kill kevin and-

so it takes a few days. i'd guess neither of them have ever considered if they want kids considering how young they are and also their lives until now and all kevin can think about is how it will affect his career so yes the wisest decision would be to just get rid of it but wymack and abby and betsy do their hardest to make sure they won't regret whatever they decide. in the end it's left up to kevin and for some reason he decides to keep it. because it's andrew? because he can finally control something about his life? because he wants to have more than just exy, somehow? because it's kind of what his mother did? maybe all of that and also as a giant fuck you to riko?

he makes sure andrew is okay with it first, of course. says andrew doesn't have to have anything to do with the kid. the only thing he asks is that andrew lets them stay there until kevin learns to stand up to riko. and that's exactly why andrew agrees. because kevin now is very different from who he was two years ago in that dingy locker room, even a few days ago when he called andrew in a panic.

so everything is the same except kevin gives birth before kathy's interview. also kandreil is real and seth lives because i said so.

interesting to think how having a young child around would change the three of them and also the team dynamics. not at all realistic though!

[pbaz7]

Claims to be: better than heat check. Let’s see shall we!

Future me: this was better than heat check

she checked the shared calendar on her phone, scanning Azzi’s schedule for the day.

- they’re cute

Azzi in a low squat, her knees pressed together tightly because of the skirt she had on, documents spread neatly across the floor as she skimmed through them.

- the baddest and it was never a competition

Paige gave Azzi’s butt a small squeeze,

- nah cs ik you seen the way paige was not very sneakily looking on the carpet Monday

“I’m not hungry.”

- you are but not for food #priorities

“Go sit down.”

- I do what I’m told bye

Paige grinned, licking a bit of sauce from the corner of her mouth after the bite. “We got a date later.”

- MAY THIS LOVE ATTACK ME AT FULL FORCE

“There’s this wine tasting.”

- that’s dangerous! Future me, how dangerous was this: that was the hottest shit I’ve read

“Only when I’m in love.”

- I’m so single😐

“Say the word and I’ll cancel the wine tasting right now.”

- woah calm down jamal

Paige laughed, taking a sip of her wine before mumbling, “That doesn’t sound like me.”

- I want Paige’s gaslighting techniques

“You tryna out-flirt me right now?”

- yes and she’s winning

Azzi glanced at her over the rim of her glass. “Sounds familiar.”

- I loled

Paige just chuckled again, the kind knowing laugh that lingered as she sat back and finally brought her glass to her lips. Shaking her head because Azzi didn’t know what she was getting into.

- I’m so scared of her Kevin gates lightskin freak ass sometimes

self-control

- FRANK OCEAN IS BACK OH MY GOSH OH MY GOSH FRANK

Paige smirked, her lips brushing Azzi’s ear now. “Start? Baby, I’m already halfway through the scene in my head.”

- what I said abt being scared of her!!!

“Don’t nobody in here know who I am.”

- the level of delusion I’m at

“Swear I don’t care about what he’s describing, I’m just tryna remember what you taste like. Been too long.”

- my jaw hit the floor. Hi. Hello.

Paige chuckled, lifting her glass. “You keep saying that like it’s a threat.”

- if I said, I want someone who acts like this, would you attack me?

Paige leaned in again, voice low. “You’re shaking.”

- she has anxiety stop playing with my girl (azzi get tf up I’m covering for u)

“That’s what I thought.”

- I GUESS you’re funny paige

By the time Azzi reached the last button, her fingers were already pushing the fabric off Paige’s shoulders, revealing the warm, flushed skin underneath.

- WAIT WAIT WAIT ARENT WE STILL IN THE CAR

her black tank top clinging to the warm curves of her body

- ykw fuck it we ball

There was a soft knock against the tinted window.

- YALL GET UP GET UP GET UP OMG IM SO EMBARRASSED OMG

Knock. Knock. Louder this time.

- whew I was so stressed omg

Sam gave a polite nod and immediately turned away, pretending not to notice anything.

- sam: I can’t see I’m blind BLIIIIIIINNNMMDDD BLIIIIIIIIINNNNNDDDD

Paige blinked once, twice, her breath catching as her gaze lingered on the delicate fabric clinging to Azzi’s chest, the bold color looking criminal on her tan skin.

- Paige’s is having a software malfunction

Matching red lace, delicate and sheer, hugged Azzi’s hips—attached with a small, garter belt clipped high up her thigh so Paige couldn’t feel it earlier. It made Paige forget where they were, who she was, and how to speak entirely

- I’m gonna leave now.

But Azzi caught them. She grabbed both of Paige’s wrists and laced their fingers together, pushing them gently but firmly above Paige’s head, pinning them to the mattress as her thighs tightened around Paige’s hips.

- I’m back to say PAIGE CANNOT HANDLE ALLAT AZZI PLEASE I NEED ONE SINGLE CHANCE PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE

“Jesus Christ, baby. I haven’t even touched you.”

- how easy I am

clearly not taking Paige seriously

- call out of work tmr ma

“But I’m about to slut you out for talkin so much shit earlier, mama.”

- IM LEAVING FR I PROMISE

I just wanted to lyk im sweating

After a few minutes Paige glances down at Azzi—lips parted slightly, brows relaxed, completely lost to sleep.

- paige can make a really funny tik tok

In the middle of the night Paige stirred faintly at the feeling of something warm and soft against her neck.

- I SAID “WHAT” ALOUD IM AT A LOSS FOR WORDS

“I want more baby.”

- slut. (same)

neither of them noticing when the moon disappeared and sunlight began to stretch across the room.

- PARTY NEXT DOOR THIS YOU???????

That was so hot. That’s all.

- annoying anon 🥸

Future me: this was better than heat check

exactly just as i said

the baddest and it was never a competition

she so bad it’s actually crazy

I'm so scared of her Kevin gates lightskin freak ass sometimes

kevin gates is actually scary 😭

if I said, I want someone who acts like this, would you attack me?

no i wouldn’t because i’ll admit my girlfriend has to deal with this from me sometimes

how easy I am

i am once again asking pleading begging for you to STAND UP

also side note i love frank lol

[rikomoriyama01]

what sort of relationship do u think raven neil and riko would have had, if Neil had originally gone to the nest? I remember reading in a fic once that riko assumed they might have got along before Neil got there cuz he was from a criminal family too whereas jean/Kevin weren't. the overall fic might have been shit idk I can't remember but I thought that was interesting

Riko is my bias so any narrative I can muse up will be biased towards him

For me Nathaniel would become rikos enforcer

Neil became foxes protector but if he was thrown into nest at age of 14 his priority would be to survive he would become what Neil feared the most and embody what it means to be the butcher.

I don't believe in raven narratives where neil becomes the saviour good guy simply because I believe raven plots work best as opposite to canon can't have eat cake and have cake unles you want to vomit it out

Raven Neil earns his safety by serving under riko

Raven Neil secures others safety by making them stay in line and dont provoke riko

Raven Neil would not live in nest the way Kevin and Jean are he has no privilege of being Kayleighs son and will not be snuffed the way Jean is . Raven Neil will harm people the way riko does just to make sure riko won't have to do that brining cold sense of peace to nest.

Raven Neil is more than just a raven. He is a king's man and he is the best of them. Because being a King's man is more than just court. Neil will become Riko's right knife.

Low-key shipping this a lot bye.

[ninyard]

Thoughts about Kevin having an actual Ed and not doing all these rants about food for fun and giggles like some ppl think

OKAY. Okay. So this is just some kind of headcanon stuff based on canon that I’ve thought about for a while. Obligatory trigger warning for ED topics specifically related to ortho/fasting/general shitty relationship with food stuff.

So. I don’t think that Kevin is capable of admitting to himself, by himself, that he has an eating disorder. But I think there’s two sides to it - there’s his body image, and there’s his healthy eating. Their overlap is sizable, but blurry, in the sense that it’s not quite clear where one starts and the other ends.

I have this image in my head of two parallel situations; the first a situation where a young Kevin is sat on a couch with his mom by his side. It’s a lazy Sunday, the TV is playing old cartoons, and Kayleigh is sitting next to her young son, both of them curled up in pyjamas and awake too early to be sane. Kayleigh a book open to one side of her and a notebook on her lap, and she’s scribbling something down that a five or six year old Kevin couldn’t care less about. He’s a good kid, a quiet kid, and all he wants some mornings is just a bowl of cereal, his mom by his side, and his favourite tv show. So he gets all three; an old episode of Kayleigh’s favourite childhood animation, the two of them curled up beneath the same long blanket, and a big bowl of coco pops on his knees, or whatever the sugary, chocolatey American equivalent is. The spoon is a teaspoon, snug in between chubby little fingers, and there’s chocolate milk and cocoa puffs all over his little face, but he’s happy. He’s content, he’s comfortable. He’s a kid, being a kid, eating the cereal that his mom buys him without question, just because it’s his favourite.

Then there’s Kevin, not many years later, sitting at a cold kitchen table with Riko across from him and Tetsuji in between - their little bodies are too big for the chairs they’ve been sat in, but they’ve been pushed forward and boosted up until they’re uncomfortably sat over a gray looking plate. They aren’t allowed eat until they can identify the protein in their breakfast, until they can recount what macros are sat on their plates. It’s a cruel and unusual thing to ask of two nine year olds, but they’re used to it by now. Kevin doesn’t like eggs anymore. Every morning it’s the same. A balanced meal, with the same amount of calories as usual, at the same time every single day of the week. Routine is good for growing minds, the master had told them, and nothing should go into a growing body without knowing exactly what it is.

The problem starts in that, when he was younger, his diet wasn’t necessarily focussed on restricting. The master wanted to ensure that Riko and Kevin were hitting their daily needs. If a plate was not empty, then a goal had not been met, and it didn’t matter how much Kevin cried that he was full, or not hungry, he couldn’t get permission to leave that table until his plate was clean. Their meal times were set and strict - any changes were usually punished in the firing of cooks or the beating of unfocused children. They were weighed each morning to ensure they were growing as they should be, gaining weight as expected, gaining muscle as required.

The older they got the more particular things got; Kevin found himself on an almost unmanageably strict diet and weight management routine - nothing unhealthy, in theory, but too healthy, instead. Times that he couldn’t deviate from, the same meals day in day out, nothing added, nothing taken away. It was when he started working harder on his physique that it became second nature - there was no space for him to be a lazy high schooler who didn’t want however many grams of protein with his dinner. That didn’t exist. Want was a non-factor. Food was always a finely crafted need.

When Exy becomes the biggest priority in his life (as if it wasn't before), when gaining muscle and working out becomes more appropriate for his age, he's introduced to intermittent fasting by a Raven dietician that should've had her license revoked. He was 14, 15, 16 and calculating the times he would be able to stop eating at in order to get a decent amount of time without food in his system. He would calculate what he would need throughout the day to eat as little as possible but to get the nutrition that he needs. They built this bulking/restricting programme into his routine, weeks where he'd eat at regular intervals throughout the day, hitting his calories and nutritional needs, and weeks where he felt like he wasn't eating much at all. It was done in a way that research deemed healthy, so who was he to argue?

So it’s normal to him, this obsession, more of a built-in requirement than something he thinks about at all. He's never been around people that don't care about things in the way he's supposed to. He doesn't remember much of his mother or her eating habits, and until he's much, much older, he isn't reminded of any of the foods he was allowed to eat as a much younger child, until a smell or a taste throws him back. (When he tells David he's never had McDonalds before, he believes he is telling the truth, but when he allows himself to try the fast food some time into the future, he remembers that taste from some memory too far away to touch. It's confusing and sickening and it feels wrong, wrong, wrong.)

I think the thing about Kevin's eating disorder is that, until he is around people that can tell him it's not normal, he doesn't see any problem with it, and even then he sees the foxes as unfocused and unserious when he's called out on it. He doesn't believe anyone when they tell him he has an unhealthy obsession with what he does and doesn't put in his body - why would he? Why would he have any reason to believe that they're right?

The way I like to imagine him understanding his issues is between a few different ways. There's David, first off, in those first couple of weeks after he broke his hand. It's beyond David how Kevin can be in their hotel room with a barely recognisable hand asking about dinner, or calculating how he could properly fast around this whole ordeal. How Kevin could barely keep down any food he was in that much pain, but still insisted on having a full meal that he forced down his throat because he had to. He watched how frustrated Kevin became when he would throw up his food, some app on his phone or a scribbled-on napkin calculating what he was missing with every day that went on where he was in too much pain to eat. There's David, who tells him he can't justify cooking him a huge meal that he can't eat, and Kevin who has a panic attack at the idea of missing a week, two weeks, of being on track. I can't play if I don't eat, he sobs, when all David is thinking about is, I'm not even sure you can play at all.

There's Abby, who does his first physical a couple of weeks into his time in PSU, who carelessly tells him his weight, and Kevin who immediately freaks out and the number being much lower than he's expecting. Abby who tells him it's okay, that he's recovering, and he who panics and asks her to buy him as many protein bars as she can find.

There's Bee, who tells him his relationship to food is unhealthy, and Kevin, who doesn't trust her at all. There's the number for an on-campus dietician and a pamphlet about eating disorders pushed across a table that he throws out into the first trash can he can find.

(There's Allison, something I could fill a whole other ask about, who can't stand watching the way that he eats, his obsessions with food, who begs Bee to do something about it because of how triggering it is for her to watch.)

So that's one side of it - his obsessive health, his over conscious eating habits, his learned behaviours that he would never deem to be unhealthy. There's that need for control over everything that goes into his body, that sends him into a spiral when he can't keep on track of things. It's the eating disorder than most people in the sports world wouldn't bat an eyelid at. He's dedicated, of course he is, he's admirably obsessed. That's just what athletes do. That's just how he was taught to care for his body. He doesn't comprehend for a long time just how damaging it is for his whole world to revolve around his next or last meal.

The other part is his body image - this one, maybe, is less tied to canon than the healthy eating, but something that I feel goes hand-in-hand with 1) him being an athlete in the public eye and 2) already having underlying issues with orthorexia and the way that he eats.

Imagine this, Kevin who has always been mindful and obsessed with the way that he looks, how much he weighs, how his body is shaped and built - he's 17, 18, doing some of his first major magazine shoots. One is for a sports magazine, or maybe a pop culture magazine, and he's doing this shoot in a few different outfits. But the last of the bunch is some shirtless shots, all harmless and not-too-revealing, but shirtless nonetheless. And Kevin has been so obsessed with his own body for so long that he knows exactly how he looks when he's unclothed. Maybe he has a mole on his lower stomach. He has a rib on his left side that sticks out a little more than the rest. His six pack isn't perfect, but it's there. He has acne on his back. Something.

Kevin does the shoot, and honestly? He feels great. He feels like he looks his best, he's happy with himself and how well he's been looking after his body, and then the magazine comes out. Then the magazine comes out, and he flicks to the section dedicated to him, and there, in a full fold-out spread, is him, shirtless. It doesn't take him long to notice the differences - he'd asked the photographer to flick through the photos at the shoot, and there's some tiny, minor editorial differences that he can't stop staring at.

There's a little bit of normal body fat that usually just hangs over his pants - it's muscle, he knows it is, and it is minuscule when he sees it on himself, but for some reason they've edited it out. The mole on his stomach is gone. The redness on his chest, on his back, the textured skin on his stomach - smooth, gone, no longer a problem. It's the first time Kevin has ever seen his body photoshopped, as if the things normal about him are a problem, and he looks closer at any shoots he's done before; tiny blemishes on his face, little scars, freckles, things he'd never even considered to be a problem, disappeared through the magic of photo editing. It's jarring, at first, but he realises then just how much it's been done. And it's not necessarily that the editors of these photos sees these things as problems, we know that, it's just how normalised it is for celebrities to be flawless at that point in time, but Kevin doesn't see it like that.

Some other times he compares edited photos and non edited photos of himself - ones where he's been made to look taller, leaner, sometimes bigger, whatever the publication required, and that manifests itself into a different obsession. It manifests into the desire to look perfect, flawless outside of the healthy eating and muscle toning he's already doing. I've always thought that if Kevin's eating disorder was to turn from something along the lines of orthorexia into something else, that that would be the reason. When he loosens up from his strict routine after joining the foxes, maybe then would come the au or the point where it'd manifest into knowingly fasting without it being a healthy-diet thing. Maybe then it'd manifest into harming his body knowingly because he feels like it'll make him look "perfect", instead of harming his mind unknowingly because he needs to be "healthy".

I should stop myself before this gets too much longer but the TL;DR is that I have a lot of thoughts about Kevin & his relationship with food and his body and I could talk about it forever. <3

[lazy-to-an-l]

I can't shut up about the foxes so heres another appreciation post.

Neil says during the Winter Conference that he doesn't think they (the upperclassmen) would be so watchful of the Monsters if Andrew was there, but I think he was just flat out wrong. When the Ravens did their strange V arrangement at the Fall Banquet, the upper classmen were out to help them in seconds. Allison spotted it and alerted it immediately, and the upper classmen were behind them immediately and fullheartedly. And Matt went searching for Neil the moment he could. The Upperclassmen may dislike the Monsters modes of operation, but they are their teammates and they will defend them until the end. They all huddle around Andrew when hes withdrawaling, they protect him and his secret sobriety fiercely. Even if they want to fight him constantly.

Matt Boyd, I adore him so much. He is ride or die for his foxes and so protective of them in his own kind and loving way. He respects Andrew but would fight him if he hurt anybody too badly. He and Wymack have similar operations, but while Wymack is hardened, Matt is empathetic and caring to his core. He loves his teammates, even the monsters, to the depths of his being. He doesn't agree with them, but he would happily fight anybody for them. That was shown the first game of the season when he took the card with a smile on his face after Kevin asked him to get the backliner off of him. Matt lets them handle their problems, like when Dan crotch shot the asshole Raven, or Neil waved him off when dealing with Riko. But the MOMENT they need him, he is ready for a fight and prepared to get hurt for them.

Allison is grieving and she dislikes the monsters on principle, but nobody fucks with her team without consequences. She dealt with her car getting damaged with calm hate and vitriol towards the Ravens fans and decidely didn't fully blame neil/ got over it quickly. She may not want to deal with the monsters more than necessary, or neil, but she would get carded protecting them, or alert the people she needs to to make sure they are okay.

Renee is closest to the Monsters because of her friendship with Andrew, but her priority is to protect the upperclassmen as Andrew and her have agreed. But her team is her team, and she is willing to go to great lengths to protect them, or anyone close to them like Jean. We know her loyalties deeply, and I think that's enough said for her.

Dan Wilds. I have so much to say and praise about her, and I am so glad she canonically becomes a coach like Wymack later on. She takes the shit thrown at her on the chin, and always has. She wants to throttle Andrew, but respects the Monsters decisions and Neils. She is hard as nails and is willing to fight and bleed and cry for her team. She handles things so well, and she doesn't take anyones shit. She won over Andrew's respect at Edens, and I wouldn't ever question if she could or would. She is fiercely protective of her team, and fiercely supports them no matter what. She is so expressive and caring, she doesn't always try to approach the Monsters because of how rocky things are between them and the upperclassmen. But she wanted to kill Riko for what he did to Andrew, and Seth, and Kevin, and Neil. She wanted to work out plans with them and converse with them. She is proud to be a Fox, and she is proud to call them all her teammates no matter their differences.